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Friday, April 29, 2016

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home : considered comment : october 2008 April 29, 2016

10/21/2008 8:00:00 AM
Be sure to read the fine print in your insurance policy
President and Owner, The Sentinel

Fire swept the plains and burned down the farmer's barn. While he surveyed the wreckage, his wife called their insurance company and asked them to send a check for $75,000, the amount of insurance on the barn.

"We don't give you the money," a company official explained. "We replace the barn and all the equipment in it."

"In that case," replied the wife, "cancel the policy I have on my husband."

An old man lived alone in Idaho. He wanted to spade his potato garden, but it was very hard work. His only son, Bubba, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament.

Dear Bubba:

I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like I won't be able to plant my potato garden this year. I'm just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. If you were here, all my troubles would be over. I know you would dig the plot for me.

Love, Dad

A few days later, he received a letter from his son.

Dear Dad:

For heaven's sake, Dad, don't dig up that garden. That's where I buried the bodies.

Love, Bubba

At 4 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local police showed up and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left.

That same day, the old man received another letter from his son.

Dear Dad:

Go ahead and plant the potatoes now. It's the best I could do under the circumstances.

Love, Bubba

Try the answers to these questions:

1. Each of two persons take a well-shuffled pack of playing cards and turns up one card at a time, keeping pace with each other. When they have gone through the packs completely, what are the chances that both will have simultaneously turned up identical cards; that is, same suit, same denomination?

2. In what moving picture did Humphrey Bogart say, "Play it again, Sam!"?

3. If you straighten out a standard paper clip, how long is the wire, within a half-inch?

4. A house is being moved on rollers, which are exactly five feet in circumference. For every complete revolution of the rollers, how far forward does the house move?

5. Imagine a free-running pulley with a rope through it. On one end of the rope is a weight of 150 pounds; on the other, a sailor weighing exactly 150 pounds. As the sailor climbs the rope, does the weight go up or down or stay at the same level?

6. Mark Twain was born in Florida. True or false?

7. British General Cornwallis did not surrender at Yorktown, ending the American Revolutionary War, true or false?


1. Five times in eight. Try it!

2. None. What he said in the movie Casablanca was: "If she can stand it, I can. Play it."

3. Four inches.

4. Ten feet.

5. It goes up.

6. True. He was born in the small town of Florida, Missouri.

7. True. Cornwallis, humiliated by his defeat, pled illness and sent Maj. Gen. Charles O'Hara to surrender for him. 

In a greasy spoon, a downhearted diner asked the waitress for meat loaf and some kind words. She brought the meat loaf but didn't say a thing.

"Hey," he said, "what about my kind word?"

"Don't eat the meat loaf."

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